Previous Posts in Tangents

Romantic Getaways: Philadelphia

October 20, 2009 by Libby

all words: Libby Ellsworth/Svetlana/Erin Ryan
all photos: Lexie Moreland + Libby’s Iphone

Preface: every once in a while BYT goes on a (mostly) completely misguided roadtrip and we write a post about it.

Why did we go to Philadelphia? Well, long story begins with the fact that see the cops were turning up the heat and we had to split town… The short story begins and ends with the fact that Peter- one of the top-of-A-list BYT contributors- happens to be in a band who opened for the Bravery at the Theater of The Living Arts.

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Our favorite NYC correspondent and a DC dispatch converged on the city of brotherly love with a vengeance– our mission: to be top flight groupies for The Dustys- instead we skipped the after party and opted to go to the Barbary where only three of us made it to the commercial shipping yard pounding Quarter Pounders at 5 am with total strangers.

How did we fare???????

Cue the handy point system we devised for this occasion:

Extra shitty driving weather +1 (perfect for early 90s alt-angst sing-alongs)

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Roy Rogers Mashed potatoes for breakfast +2

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Shrooming at the Philadelphia Museum of Art for 3+ hours +4

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Shaker glassware -2

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Exploiting Rocky -4

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Sexually Exploiting Rocky +6

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Seeing the Liberty bell (out of order) and acting jaded -3

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Seeing the Liberty bell and acting enthused +3

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Liberty Bell itself (the non-cracked out side): +.5

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Budweiser Urban Surfer +5

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Giant Cookie +2

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Killer Mosaics just off South Street +2

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Blue drinks with professional poker players +2

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Pink drinks with professional poker players +3

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Gross Pizza -3

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Gross Pizza when you’re a wasted amateur and named Aaron +4

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Wearing your late grandmother’s tiger belt +22

Arriving to the show fashionably early +6

Hanging out with tons of teenage Bravery fans (who were there even earlier) +7

Reconnecting with friends +30

Having Braces -4 (debatable-ed)

Loving The Dustys’ set +5

Booing The Bravery’s set +5

“This Dude should take his shirt off!”That’s what I’m talking about -11

Getting into random Pakistani dude’s parents Jeep Grand Cherokee letting him take you to the commercial shipping docks + 12

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Adding up is hard-just look at some pictures now:

Erin Ryan’s Reflects

First impressions of philly: Rainy, cold, vaguely french. Adorable waitress at crepe restaurant suggested we search for hair jewelry. By hair jewelry, she of course meant combs, barretts, and headbands woven from strands of dead peoples’ hair. “You know, like when your friend dies and you make hair jewelry from their hair?” Group becomes suspicious of adorable waitress. Turns out the feeling is mutual. When she finds out where we’re from, she responds smiling “ohhh, D.C. it’s so mysterious there- you guys could be spies.” Pretty sure she winked as well.

middle impressions: omitted cuz i was a failure (too many blue drinks-ed)

Last impression of philly: Just onto 95 north out of the city, we spot a car with a white sign taped to the outside, we assume an awesome prank by this dude’s friends. Sign says “hey ladies, today is my birthday, please flash me.” We prepare accordingly, and when pulling up next to him on the highway, he doesn’t even take a second glance before holding up a sign that says only “I DARE YOU.” Libby rewards his efforts by explaining to the car what a great husband that guy would make. God willing.

For “Previously on Romantic Getaways” please make sure to check out our Atlantic City Edition here:

http://www.brightestyoungthings.com/tangents/romantic-getaway-atlantic-city/

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Bobby bottleservice Says:

Do you date me?

October 20, 2009 at 9:11 am

Danielle Says:

Philadelphia is my favorite city on the east coast. no lie.
especially the Mutter museum of medical oddities, featuring various body parts in jars and a gigantic colon that looks like a grotesque sleeping bag. and Philly’s wine bars don’t have epically long lines.

October 20, 2009 at 9:37 am

amy v. Says:

mutter museum was a bit disappointing. not gross enough and the first floor was entirely of waxed replicas. who wants to look at rusted artifacts from lewis and clarks expedition? i was hoping to upchuck my vermicious knids after having a less than mediocre philly cheesesteak minus the cheese whiz, and nothing happened. it’s more of a puke fest at the walter reed medical museum.

October 20, 2009 at 9:58 am

Old Man Says:

Is just someone’s Flickr account?

October 20, 2009 at 12:16 pm

Lex Says:

ya old man–direct feed

October 21, 2009 at 9:30 am

cat Says:

…but mutter (downstairs) has 1. an entire wall of wax heads, each of which sports a DIFFERENT eye disease, and 2. has a huge check full to the brim of items that have been extracted from varietal orifices in hospitals!!! it’s a little amazing. maybe you should have gotten yours with whiz.

November 30, 2009 at 3:21 pm

chad Says:

i agree w/ amy v. about both the mütter and walter reed.

my overall impression of phillie is that it smells bad. lots of good history tho.

November 30, 2009 at 4:49 pm