Its getting down to the grind kids. And by this I mean “in barely 2 or 3 weeks the weight of reviewing this every week will be lifted of my poor little shoulders” and AMEN to that.
This week, we had Korto, Leanne, Jerell, Kenley and Suede left.
In the beginning, and I swear this is because the producers made them do this to shake things up (just a teeeeeny tiny) a bit, during the model regrouping, Leanne ditches Caroline, picks Suede’s model (cue: creepy belatedly recorded 3rd person monologue from Suede about getting Tia back), Kenley decides not to go with the boxy Asian chick she inherited from Kelli and there is actual some little stirring of emotions with Korto whispering “You’re such a heartbreaker Leanne”.
Then to the challenge: To the challenge! The designers are supposed to design for each other BUT NOT REALLY FOR EACH OTHER, they are just supposed to design clothes to fit the other designers that are inspired by A MUSICAL GENRE (astrological signs, musical genres, really, what next? favorite desserts? can we get any more trite). A musical genre Tim pulls out of the hat, no less.
The pairings go like this:
- Jerell will design for Kenley (who is POP)
- Kenley will design for Leanne (who is HIP-HOP or not)
- Leanne will design for Korto (who is COUNTRY which actually prompts Tim to guffaw while announcing it, spreading the flames of white upper middle class domination even further. Remember that “music” myspace box everyone had to fill, and when someone wrote “Anything but country” did you wanna punch them in the face? BECAUSE I DID. That’s how (for the first time ever) I wanted to punch Tim in the face last night)
- Korto will design for Suede (who is PUNK) AND
- Suede will design for Jerell (who is ROCK)
As they giggle nervously (and Korto says (and I paraphrase): “I got Suede to design for and my genre is COUNTRY. Who would want to be me? I think NO ONE” my roommate turns to me and says: “This is going to be boring. A little more so than usual.”
So, they go shopping and arguing and people say things like “Of course it has crossed my mind to sabotage Suede”, and Korto line dances a little and Kenley is loud and annoying and Leanne does and awkward little rap and you know…its (dull) business as usual. I totally wished Stella was around to bust out a hammer and do some gromets just so we would not have to listen to them whine.
And then Tim rolls in for critiques AND SHUTS KENLEY UP.
In a hard-core stare down, if looks could kill kind of moment
Like: “Bitch I’ve had to deal with you and your annoying laugh for 10 episodes now, don’t even start pulling any of this attitude with me now”
And I sort of got happy.
TIM-AMERICA THANKS YOU FOR THOSE 20 SECONDS.
we do.
Then its runway time (”The crotch is really a little wierd still”-says Kenley of her hip hop disaster -”But nothing judges should notice”) and I have to say, the hair and make up people do a pretty snazzy job with the gruesome fivesome and LL Cool J is guest judging, making me think of this video the whole time:
And then:
Korto wins for Suede’s punk outfit. Its cool, I guess, but let me tell you: if it was someone else wearing it, it would NOT have been as memorable. They should bring Suede out with the models next week, show those bitches how its done.
Suede on the other had gets eliminated for his “too subtle” Jerell look. I am happy he is gone but he has fucked up so much more that this week I actually thought he did a semi decent job and I got kinda sad.
Jerell did really well amping Kenley up into Britney (”the good years”)
Leanne did a non-disasterous job with the whole “chicken fried Korto” look (in Tim’s words: “Leanne designs for Korto’s country persona. This look reminded me of Ethel Merman in Annie Get Your Gun (which is amusing in these days of Sarah Palin!)”)
and seriously the crotch on Kenley’s jeans was making me cry “God help me” even though I don’t even believe in God.
An LL said (calmly, while he was not too busy perving on Kenley’s mesh outfit) “It just does not feel like she is part of the culture”) and Kenley got defensive and Nina (at this point VISIBLY) bored reprimanded her with “YOU’RE NOT THE ONLY ONE FOR WHOM THIS IS HARD KENLEY”, and while most people may say she meant the rest of the designers, I really do think she meant herself, and having to suFFer through this.
Next week:
I dunno, they go to fashion week?
the tents burn down in shame?
anyone’s guess really.
I cannot believe kenley did not get kicked off. WHAT.
If I were her I wouldve made a little navy track suit dress, (like a jacket but longer and fitted), with a big logo on the back, in white and green, like, zipped up over a bright green bandeau top with rhinestones that spelled out like “WORD”, and then white high top sneakers that had puffy tongues and orange and turquoise laces with red accents. That at least would be something cute but also a throwback to hip hop in terms of colors and bling..and maybe a little kangol hat. ha.
kenley has got to be going home next week.
and can you believe how small she is? she always wears unflattering/frumpy clothes.
September 25, 2008 at 11:11 amThis is like when Marissa died on the OC and you just knew that the show had jumped the shark. Good thing I now have the Rachel Zoe Project to keep my needs satisfied.
September 25, 2008 at 11:28 amConversation of the week:
Heidi: (looking at Jerrel’s dress for Kenley): I wish the silver cups were more supported
LL: they look supported to ME
Kenley: blush/nervous giggles/melting puddle
hilarious!
September 25, 2008 at 11:58 amthat arrogant bitch kenley should have gone home… i like some of her stuff, but her attitude is unbearable. nobody treats tim that way - hehehe
i also think leanne should let that makeup artist and hair stylist nice her up more often - she looked great from the neck up.
September 25, 2008 at 1:11 pmi mean, suede’s a little annoying with his third person lingo and all, but at least he doesnt blame the model for not having the right attitude to make his outfit work. I really liked his outfit for jerrell and he obviously tailored it to jerrells personality as you can tell from the v necked shape of the shirt. I think its a really beautiful set of garments that a lot of people would actually buy.
Not to say Korto’s wasnt great too, her look was also very hip, and I’m glad she won.
But why on earth woul dhte judges kick off something well made and cool for a look that completely misses the mark?
huh huh.
There must be something we dont know.
Is Kenley getting it on with the judging panel? Hmm.
Food for thought, people.
September 25, 2008 at 3:18 pmi don’t know, smash, she and LL could be in cahoots for all we know.
September 25, 2008 at 3:26 pmAmanda, you may have hit it dead on. Time will tell…doesn’t it always? I’m sure Rachel Zoe has the gossip.
September 25, 2008 at 4:41 pmscroll down this column while listening to paris is burning by ladyhawke. it’s the perfect beat to imagine them on the runway to. okay back to my actual job…ta ta.
September 25, 2008 at 4:42 pm
Before the show started, i predicted that Suede would be out. But, after the runway, i couldn’t believe they let Kenley stay.
September 25, 2008 at 10:57 am