RIn this weekly feature Nina (a real live breathing 17 year old-ed) will examine whatever song is currently at the top end of the charts and defend its “musical merits” to the best of her ability talk about it.
"Right Round" by Flo Rida
Dead or Alive's "You Spin Me Round (Like a Record)" was released in 1984, a full eight years before I would grace the earth with my presence. Everyone from Jessica Simpson to Eiffel 65 ("I'm blue da-ba-de...") has covered it. It was only a matter of time until a terrible "rapper" such as Flo Rida decided to sample it and change it from being about innocent dancing to...not-innocent dancing.
I have a quite a lengthy list of grievances against Flo Rida. For starters, he thinks he's clever by putting a space in the word "Florida." Not only is that a completely dumb gimmick (in his logo, the "F" is shaped like the state...ugh), it's a completely dumb name. For anyone. Especially a musician. Grievance #2: His PAINFULLY TERRIBLE song "Low" is I believe one of the most downloaded songs ever. EVER. The lyrics about Apple Bottom jeans and Reeboks with the straps are the worst examples of advertising (ex: Chris Brown's Doublemint gum reference in "Forever") embedded into music ever. EVER.
Moving on. If I had average taste for someone my age, I think I'd love "Right Round." I'd find it really super catchy and I'd make it my Facebook status and then I would talk about it at school like, "OMG that new Flo Rida song?!?? SO GOOD! Did you know it's based on an old song from the 80's or something?? Yeah the one from Wedding Singer!!"
But my taste is kinda different. While I really like pop music, there are some rappers/musicians like Flo Rida (also: Lady GaGa, Katy Perry) that I just can't stand. It pains me that people like it simply because of the sample. Flo Rida adds absolutely nothing to the track. They should have just re-released the Dead or Alive original.
Rating: 20/40. This song will surely be played at every school dance I attend from here on out.
God loves a cheerful giver.
Wow. That is truly awful. The original "Right Round" is one of my favorite 80s songs. I am appalled!
wait, did Nina have a birthday? did i miss the party?
I did indeed! yeah i'm sorry you couldn't make it to the party. your invitation got lost in the mail or something.....
Just FYI, T-Pain wrote Low, not Flo-Rida, and is mostly responsible for its mega smash #1 downloaded song of all time status. While that really makes Flo-Rida worse for not even writing his own rhymes, he's a bit of Manchurian candidate here, judge him not for he know not what he do.
T-Pain is genius.