Svetlana and I are pretty obsessed with Netflix. I take the slightly more OCD route though by rating all my movies (between 1 and 5 stars) and rearranging my queue on an hourly basis. I will often berate her for giving odd ratings: “5 stars out of 5 for The Descent? Really?” She doesn’t care. I also send a lot of “notes” to friends, a Netflix feature that allows you to suggest movies to your friends via an up to 200 character mini review. Svetlana wishes I would channel all my Netflix energy into BYT. So at her request every once in a while I’ll post some of my mini-reviews from the past 4+ years, ten or so at a time. Feel free to give me shit like I give her shit:
Die Hard 2: Die Harder
Unlike the first one, this cheesy sequel has too many plot holes and a terrible supporting cast. Was only cool when you were 11.
2 Stars
Anvil: The Story of Anvil
Hilarious documentary about two aging metal heads, David St. Hubbins and Nigel Tufnel, who carry on with their band Spinal Tap even though fame and fortune has eluded them for 30 years. Waitaminute…
4 Stars
The Brothers Bloom
Full of style and energy, and quite entertaining at times… but ultimately wears out it’s welcome long after you’ve given up on giving a shit.
3 Stars
Goodbye Solo
My years of living in Winston-Salem added an uneasy sense of misplaced nostalgia while watching this poetic film. It is wonderfully acted and moving, and very funny at times. Will stick with you.
4 Stars
Conan the Barbarian
Plenty of entertaining WTF moments, like where Conan punches a camel in the face for no apparent reason, but mostly it’s tiresome. Also, I’m pretty sure they were making it up as they went along.
2 Stars
G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra
A few fun ideas, nostalgic winks, & decent casting can’t save this trainwreck. If u weren’t obsessed with the toy line as a child, delete this from your queue ASAP. Otherwise… well, still delete it.
2 Stars
Battlestar Galactica: The Plan
Basically a 2 hour glorified outtake focusing on none of your favorite characters. Some plot holes are filled, and it is entertaining for uber fans, but lacks cohesiveness or an engaging narrative.
3 Stars
Quantum of Solace
The byzantine plot and frantic editing make it a confusing ride, but an exhilarating one nonetheless. Daniel Craig has officially turned me into a Bond fan. Next one pleeze.
4 Stars
The Warriors
This cult classic should of course be viewed by everyone, but that doesn’t mean it’s any good. In fact, it’s abysmal. The director’s cut adds a new hilariously pretentious opening.
2 Stars
Bruno
Watching with interactive commentary shed a whole new light on the project. All the parts you thought were staged were actually real and the risk of danger/arrest imminent. Great deleted scenes too.
5 Stars
Wanna be my Netflix friend? Click here:
http://www.netflix.com/BeMyFriend/PmzrQcDhoaLYHM0oKBu0
Check out One Second Movie Reviews Part 16 here:
http://www.brightestyoungthings.com/movies/one-second-movie-reviews-part-16/
Wanna know what’s going to be avail to steam on Netflix? Check these guys out:
http://www.streamingsoon.com/
Also check out this cool article on nytimes.com that Svet found where you can click on DC and then scroll through movies to see what neighborhoods rented them:
http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2010/01/10/nyregion/20100110-netflix-map.html?hp
I’ve been told that Mega Shark v. Giant Octopus is worth the watch just for the gratuitous amount of continuity errors.
January 13, 2010 at 11:13 amThe Salton Sea: starts slow but picks up rapidly. Excellent performance by Vincent D’Nofrio as Pooh Bear.
One False Move: early Billy Bob Thornton performance. Were it not for the violence/content it comes across as a Made for TV movie. Not bad but wouldn’t put it at the top of your list.
Quest for Fire: Ron Perlman didn’t need makeup to portray a caveman. Much better caveman movies out there. Kind of stupid. Stopped halfway.
The Rookie: Svetlana would run out of tears after the first half.
Legend of the Red Dragon: wanted to like it but it was dubbed so turned it off after 15 minutes.
Rosewood: Holy shit those crackers were fucked up.
The Emperor and the Assassin: Good. Bad editing though.
The Day The Earth Stood Still (new one): Meh. Finished it but meh.
The Snow Walker: Beautiful Alaskan sparse scenery. The Inuit chick steals the show. Good survival flick.
Invincible: Warner Hedgehog flick he apparently wrote in 10 days. Good story, poor acting. Seems thrown together but not a bad movie. Tim Roth is good as always.
The Ninth Configuration: dumb. Fell asleep.
January 13, 2010 at 11:33 amThanks for the shoutout to us @ Streaming Soon (also we’re at Twitter.com/streamingsoon). We love Netflix as much as you do (though my personal OCD of queue shuffling has slowed some, I still check or mess with my queue once a day, outside of work done on S.S. At some point I realized that I needed to stop adding movies and TV shows to my queue for a long while, and work on what I’ve got as it is).
Concerning Netflix Notes, did you know that you can thread notes? If you send that 200 character note, and still have a few more words, just wait until it sends, and pick the same person and start a new note. It’ll thread, as long as you’re on the same Movie/TV title.
I don’t know how widely known that is, so don’t get mad if you already know it ;)
January 25, 2010 at 4:39 pm
Apparently the latest Bond movie will be in 3D. This isn’t a good idea.
http://sffmedia.com/films/science-fiction-films/460-next-james-bond-in-3d-but-no-3d-robocop-remake-for-aronofsky.html
January 13, 2010 at 11:01 am