Well, I guess you could say I don’t work in any specific location for pay. One thing that struck me about DC was how there were no superheroes protecting the streets. I was born with the ability to fly two inches above the ground, so I took it upon myself to make myself a costume and start taking care of business. I’ve been playing around with names a lot, but usually I just borrow from rappers. Automatic street cred.
2. I usually just wrestle crocodiles and politicians in the DC sewers. Everyone’s always saying those crocodiles in the sewers are a myth. Well, yeah, because I killed all of them. Politicians are surprisingly harder to battle.
3. Well, I have noticed that the sewer stench may or may not be following me around, but I’d like to think it’s just everyone and everything else that smells that way. So I’m gonna say 10.
4. Ever since they banned talking on cell phones while driving. I like to find the people who ignore that rule and punch them in the face at stoplights.
5. Well, I tend to shy away from human companionship, but a pack of stray dogs and cats usually follows me around. Sometimes we like to hang out, talk about our days.
6. I enjoy Lifetime movies. All of them are my favorite.
7. Inca Kola. It fuels my super power of flying two inches off the ground. If I drink a gallon of that stuff, my ability increases by an inch.
8. It’s just that I live with this other struggling superhero named Barack Obama. You probably think I’m lying. Well that’s my pet peeve. He’s embarrassed of our friendship, so no one will ever know the truth.

1, trashcans across the street from 2000s
2. drinking, write poems in my own blood on a mirror
3. Pie
4. i _am_ dc
5. every night. context: Interviews/Photoshoots
6. Hotel New Hampshire
7. Whiskey and more of it
8. They write terrible poetry on my mirrors in blood

wowk, i never thought to use one of these.

1. Where do you work and what do you do there?
Brightest Young Things and I’m a lush.

2. What do you like to do when you come home from work? What do you like to do outside of work?
Party, Party, look good. shop for tight sexy hipster dresses and ya know, SHOES.

3. How clean/tidy would you describe yourself? (1 is absolute pig, 10 is super clean)
I’m a chick so I’ll say 10, but after i live with you you’ll realize I’m a filthy Whore.

4. How long have you lived in DC?
I just got here, I’m an intern.

5. Do you ever bring friends/hookups back to the apartment? If so how often and in what context?
I like to fuck. but only after 3 pills of E and 3 hours of foreplay while listening to dirty electro.

6. What’s your favorite movie?
Whatever.

7. What’s your favorite drink?
Just get me drunk.

8. What’s your biggest pet peeve about who you live with?
There not THAT into themselves.

Interesting. A lady that Michael and myself know got the following in responce to their request for more information. I think you should go with it. It’s a bit long, but will really help to establish who you are.

“Hi Chrissy,

I’ll be glad to oblige your request for more insights into myself, although I’m sort of feeling it’s moot at this particular point in time. (If you’re in the mood for a novelette for bedtime reading.)

You see, I’ve been getting pressure from my girlfriend–and her 10 year old son , my other roomate, doesn’t even support her in this, because, as he manifests daily (you know, “showing” is much more persuasive than “telling”), the kid is rather attached to me–to move out of their little townhouse in Reston. Yet, this seemingly mood based directive, waxes and wanes like the tides at the beach.

So, the above, not being merely gossipy chit chat, should serve to demonstrate what sort of person I am.
I mean, if kids get attached to me, then cats will follow suit, since I’m a caring person. More specifically,though, since it seems to be your primary concern, I grew up with cats–one momma and endless litters of fascination for us kids,still use my former wife and I’s cat’s name as a password, and actually ask about Scamper when I talk to the ex.’s friend about her–Scamper and SneeZy(sic.), the American Eskimo dog we had.
Pets out of the way, notwithstanding, I must now address the issue my opening paragraph also suggests, possibly, and more importantly, I guess.
That is, as someone with a wife who left me and a girlfriend who’s trying to get me to leave her, I seem to
have some answering to do regarding getting along with my own species, particularly that half of it.

Well, they did, when I worked for the group home company, transfer me to the home inhabited by four mildly MR women, when they couldn’t figure out what to do with me (because, after talking to me once, the sisters of this one severely MR girl didn’t want this young man (me) providing total care for their 27 yr. old litttle sis’. She was exactly toddler like–more like 6 months-like, but she had the body of a toddler, except for the anatomical development of her 27 years.)
So,I’m not too bad at getting along with women. (And in your house I’m sure I won’t be called upon to administer the vaginal yeast infection treatment to one of the residents, like I was one night by Bethel,the Bama who had the sense of a 7 year old, though she, too, was in her twenties.)

But I can fix the plumbing and (a little) carpentryon demand (I’m getting a little egotiscal about my plumbing prowess these days!, though I’ll leave it at that for present [potential] purposes,) and I can write a mean/keen letter, or short story to whomever, if you ever need it.

No, really, to answer the point I brought up, the girlfriend loves me, but has been talked to too much by her new Christian friends–about the evils of pre-martial co-habitation, and of men, generally, it appears. However,these friends become somewhat confused when they meet me, and I tell them how I tried to stay apart once, but she’d call me and say,”Why aren’t you over here?”, and how I provide the disciplining her son so egregiously doesn’t get from her–stuff like, “Brian, now we’re all cleaning the house today, you’ve got to help, too.”
Truly, I’ve introduced her to the concept that her little boy can actually be a working asset, not just mouth to feed and a body to cuddle.
Oh, all this is despite her newly adopted mantra of personal dislike of me–yeah, repeated like a lesson she was taught but doesn’t believe, she seems to take some pleasure in stating for the record, and directly to me, that she neither loves, likes nor respects me (although, “Finish your dinner I cooked for you first,” or “Don’t forget, tomorrow we have to go to the program at Brian’s school,” goes right along with this supposed shunning.

And now the wife. Well,she was, I say, overly Christian, too, Catholic. Which is not to lay blame, for I went/go with them to their respective churches, preferring, actually , the Catholic one, that is, not the evangelical Christian one–it’s “in your face Christianity,” I call it.
No, religion aside, it’s the person. She told both my sister and our mutual friend, the one mentioned above, that she left me because she could’t take episodes like me alarming the whole port security crew in Honolulu, when I wouldn’t obey one squat Hawaiin lady guard’s orders to “walk the gauntlet” (quotes mine to show sarcasm) around the facility to exit, when I was exiting out the “wrong” door.

To make a hasty conclusion, let me say I really don’t know what the wind of mood will bring around here, so I might be inquiring further. I.e., TBA, if you’re still looking by then , whenever ,then is.”

1. Where do you work and what do you do there?
Phone sex operator, I work from home.

2. What do you like to do when you come home from work? What do you like to do outside of work?
My work is my life.

1. Where do you work and what do you do there?
i work for a group called Brightest Young Things–we’re a green sustainable fluorescent lighbulb company. what we do there is secret.

2. What do you like to do when you come home from work? What do you like to do outside of work?
20 minutes gregorian chant or silent prayer, [not to be directly looked at during this time].

3. How clean/tidy would you describe yourself? (1 is absolute pig, 10 is super clean)
1.6180339887498948482, the golden ratio. fuck your simplistic system, cracker.

4. How long have you lived in DC?
seven years.

5. Do you ever bring friends/hookups back to the apartment? If so how often and in what context?
i do whatever the fuck i want, whensoever i please.

6. What’s your favorite movie?
i enjoy watching the wizard of oz, but with the soundtrack from labrynth dubbed over it. and with frames of david bowie sliced in. also pretty into cannibal snuff films from papua new guinea.

7. What’s your favorite drink?
church wine. i wait all week for that extra sip i steel. mea culpa.

8. What’s your biggest pet peeve about who you live with?
i do not appreciate natural light, visitors, or being looked directly in the eye for more than 1 second.

Forget the questionnaire, you should live here!

http://washingtondc.craigslist.org/doc/roo/1260330084.html