Unless you’ve been under a rock (or away from the internet/reading) for the last 24 hours you inevitably read City Paper’s cover story expose on Late Night Shots (done most interpidly and commendably by Angela Valdez, if we say so ourselves).
And then Jezebel’s and Wonkette’s recount of the comments on the City Paper’s cover story comments, and then read all the comments on Wonkette’s story on the City Paper comments and are
dizzy by now.
But since everyone is in on it, and since LNS-ers (for the uninitiated, the members of Late Night’s Shots, a website that operates like MySpace and Facebook, but with a heavy emphasis on booze. To get an invite to the site, you need a connection among the clientele of a few select Georgetown night spots. Users have “drinking buddies” instead of “friends” and must list their favorite bars and restaurants. Oh and if you are foreign-tough luck, the application offers zero opportunities for your hometown to actually be from outside United States) are the easiest and funnest target in DC, we decided to post some choice comments we enjoyed ourselves:
# Sally Hemmings Jul. 12, 2007, at 12:17 pm
Let the record show that I was at the party where Angela Valdez was blackout drunk—overly intoxicated and spilling drinks on people at the LNS party she so casually mentions. I am shocked that she has chosen to libel all parties involved, especially in the age of google when these persons, who did not want to speak with her, literally will lose jobs because of this… much less over words they did not speak. Interesting that when you google her name, she has plagiarized another writer’s work. The most offensive part of this article is that nearly everyone she came into contact with treated her extremely well. This is the most unprofessional piece of writing I have read in a long time. She is a pathetic, unethical, and unprofessional person who should locked up in a jail cell with other duplicitious, no-talented clowns who propagate falsehoods.
# Comment: By: Angela Valdez Jul. 12, 2007, at 12:24 pm
While interviewing people in the bathroom, I knocked over a drink sitting on the counter. I was not drunk, and certainly not blackout drunk.
# Comment: By: Angie “Herpes Simplex B” Valdes Jul. 12, 2007, at 12:35 pm
People saw you drunk and groping men. You’re a horrible person, and you’ve ruined people’s lives over this article. Do you have any shame? I know of one person in this article who was fired an hour ago. Whatever happened to responsible journalism?
# Comment: By: MGR Jul. 12, 2007, at 2:29 pm
………..
Let’s be honest here. Any large social group has their fair share of jerks and assholes. Have you ever tried hanging out with the hipster crowd in DC (a social group I’m confident Ms. Valdez would associate herself with)? I have and I’m here to tell you that they can be just as rude, obnoxious, and elitist as anybody else (”You’re not a Democrat and you voted for Bush? Goodbye!!”). And despite their disdain for “conformists”, the joke is truly on them because they are conformists like the rest of us, albeit in distinctly different ways. Whether it’s the obscure but hot indie rock band or the latest hipster t-shirt (my current fave “I LISTEN TO BANDS THAT DON’T EVEN EXIST YET”), these people are no different. (i think they are referring to you fair readers-ed)
# Comment: By: MGR Jul. 12, 2007, at 2:29 pm
At the end of the day, they hate because they are jealous. Jealous of our priviledge, jealous of our economic success, jealous of our fun. I hate to say it but they hate us for the same reasons the terrorists do. Perhaps that’s why they all want us to withdraw from Iraq and hand victory to al Qaeda on a silver platter? Ok, I better stop before I go off on a major tangent/rant here.
# Comment: By: k Jul. 12, 2007, at 2:35 pm
“I hate to say it but they hate us for the same reasons the terrorists do. ”
Oh my god, I just peed my pants. Fuck. How am I going to explain that to the bosses? “Sorry, I have to head home. Either somebody is a really great satirist, or actually believes the whole ‘they hate our freedom’” partyline. Either way, it was hysterical, AND - the poster couldn’t spell ‘privilege”. Oh, the irony! See you tomorrow.”
Comment: By: :’( Jul. 12, 2007, at 2:46 pm
It’s cute watching the friends of the exposed band together.
# Comment: By: Weed Laundry Jul. 12, 2007, at 6:08 pm
The glorious irony of this comment section is that it’s turned into a typical LNS forum.
and then soooooooooooooooooooooooo much more.
if you have time today knock yourself out
we ourselves are going to go take a nap.
but we will leave you with this gem of communication we ourselves encoutered on the pages of LNS bulletins last fall, back when we still sort of cared..
Food for thought, everyone.
Breakage
Posted By: Plan B on 11-29-2006 10:00 am Report as shockingly offensive
Last night, after a few too many glasses of wine at Milano, I dropped my date off at her apartment. She asked me up for a drink. I was not into it, but Tuesday night takedowns only happen ever so often so I proceeded. She made me wear a condom because she was not on the pill for some reason. Deed done, I went into the bathroom to dispose of said condom and discovered it had long since broken. In a panic, I went back into her room, chatted for a few minutes and then departed gracefully. She also mentioned she was glad we slept together because she was getting her period in a few days. I failed to mention whatsoever that I may have impregnated her. Do I have to say something or just leave it be and hope she won’t get pregnant? Maybe she knew? I never want to see or talk to her again. She was a boring conversationalist and the sex was bad.
RE: Breakage
Posted By: oh god on 11-29-2006 12:00 pm Report as shockingly offensive
wait, plan b? im kind of freaking out. were you at a table in the front room of milano with me at milano and did we stop at the cvs in gtown before going back to my place to buy durex ultra thin condoms? i tried calling but you wont pick up.
RE: Breakage
Posted By: Plan B on 11-29-2006 12:16 pm Report as shockingly offensive
oh god: I probably should have searched for your profile on here first. That’s us. Check your gmail and tell me what you want to do. Sorry.
RE: Breakage
Posted By: oh god on 11-29-2006 1:16 pm Report as shockingly offensive
this is unbelievable. how could you not tell m? i could have taken plan b this morning instead of having to run all the way to cvs sobbing.
————-
FYI, they also post topics like, “Muslims… what to do about them,” “Peeing the bed” and, of course “girls who are ridiculously aggressive in bed”
seriously, nap and cool drink time now.
I did not see the comment.
(must have come post dizzyness)
LNS had a hate thread bulletin on us last fall. Something about being dirty and tattoed and uneducated and listening to bands named CUNT.
(I do think the fact that “the girl that runs it is not even American” was mentioned as well)
Bless everyone’s heart.
And bless the interweb.
oh my god, you poor, dumb, hipster immigrant! back to serbia with you!! what right do you have even existing?!
i love the uneducated thing. most people like to rag on “hipsters” (i fucking hate this term; it has little-to-no meaning anymore, in my eyes) for being over-educated liberal windbags! LNSers are so funny sometimes. tee hee.
ooh, what about a BYT-sponsored raid on smith point? (on a thursday of course, the only day they let us plebs in.)
oh no, wait. that would be a really, really bad idea. it’d turn into “the outsiders”, all greasers vs socs. let’s just stay in our corner of the sandbox and they can stay in theirs and the world will keep on a-turnin’.
July 13, 2007 at 4:35 pmDon’t make me point out the irony involved in us making fun of them while they make fun of us and we all make fun of the crowd at the Smashing Pumpkins show. Holy fuck. I was at Duffy’s before the concert (no, I wasn’t going to the concert, I am merely setting a time frame) and out of 22 dudes, 17 of them had on cargo shorts and t-shirts.
So anyway. I started reading this article and then it got kind of long and a little bad and then I realized I just don’t give a flying fuck about people who hang out in Georgetown, nor what they think (or don’t think), nor which boring assed person they’re banging at the moment, for the moment.
It’s better sometimes to just say “Yep. I hate you for your freedom” and then go have a drink.
July 13, 2007 at 4:43 pmoh trust me, i see the irony. it’s kind of delicious!
what i’m really making fun of is their insane reaction to the article. i mean, threatening legal action? saying people are getting fired or are suffering reputation harm? hahaha! it’s awesome.
for the record, michael, i hate your freedom the most. which is why i do so many shots at the cat - they help me cope. hee!
July 13, 2007 at 4:59 pmWell in my defense I’ve been going commando for about 12 years now. Freedom is a wonderful thing.
I doubt anyone got fired. If they did then that’s what they get for wanting to show off their lifestyle in that “look at me” fashion. Now if someone could also take their money away…
July 13, 2007 at 5:06 pmLNS seems to have no chance at a libel case
truth is an absolute bar to recovery for damages
so if someone lost their job (wages), sex life (consortium), etc. because of what was reported, too bad if it’s true
and these cats definitely don’t qualify as public officials
especially since they’ve made their site so exclusive
so no malice vs. negligence arguments allowed regarding the publication of this news
sorry to get legal, but somebody had to do it
July 13, 2007 at 5:33 pmI wonder if the nonsensical high school divisions that began in Junior High continue for the rest of our lives or if they dissipate—to the any LNS readers, dissipate means to scatter and disappear (more or less)—when we hit 30.
July 13, 2007 at 5:44 pmOh the humanity! When will it end?!?
July 13, 2007 at 6:02 pmI feel the Hipster/Preppy hatred brewing once again. Now that the preps are too embarrassed to go out in G-town for a couple of days, they may have to venture East - kicking undergrads out of McFaddens, even hitting Dupont, god help them when they realize how preppy sartorial culture was reappropriated by gays who generally look better in Abercrombie and Ralph Lauren then they do. Being that they’re infringing on hipster turf if they venture towards U or 14th (not so worried about H street, being that it’s basically off the preppy grid - NE, I don’t think so), though I guess Local 16 went to the chavs a while ago (no one talks about chavs here, even with Beckham and Posh Spice stateside!), I think we should call a global summit on neutral territory. It’s worrying enough that they stole Bart Seaver from 14th Street. Next there’ll be a Rock and Roll Country Club on Cady Alley next to Leopolds (not that I know where anything is in Georgetown, of course). We need to work together to stop the insanity!
We could stage it at Zaytinya (no one seems to care about the Gallery Place/Penn Quarter yuppie scene either, which is a shame. There’s a Hagen Dazs there - . ) if only there were anywhere to fucking park. I guess that hair salons, generally speaking, are essentially neutral territories as well.
Am I the only person who thinks the Georgetown Connector could function sort of like the Underground Railroad?
N.
P.S. - I will state, for the record, that I am not a half-bad polo player and will challenge any LNS reader to a ride-off if necessary. Or a Chinese Downhill.
July 14, 2007 at 3:52 amhey doctor no,
this is a total aside but just last night a friend of mine explained to me what chavs are. i had never heard of the term, my friend living in dublin had referred to rudeboys clad in velour jumpsuits as ‘knackers’. have you heard of the term?
back to the subject at hand, this is all so pretty in pink. i’d like to thank miss valdes for the article and extend my sympathies for the subsequent harrassment. the predecessors to these assholes were right to not allow a metro stop be built in georgetown. better to keep em isolated in their little corner of the world. i’ll happily stay on my side of the tracks. unless someone has a plan to drive them into potomac and rosslyn.
July 14, 2007 at 3:36 pmKnackers, chavs. Pretty close to the same thing, I guess.
Re: LNS, the funniest thing to me is that the LNS’ers seem to be sort of second-tier WASPS as opposed to the G-town elite, hence protecting themselves so arduously. But even the superficial identification with the high-end WASP culture would be considered a bit gauche. Sort of like when I was 13, I used to wear baggy cross colors t-shirts with african logos on them, and so did a bunch of my also-white non-ghetto-residing friends. I would defend my style as if I couldn’t possibly wear anything else. All pictures from this era have been burned.
N.
July 14, 2007 at 8:21 pmChavs! Thanks for pulling that term out.. I love the various possibilities for conjugation regarding “Chav”.. mainly “chavish”..
…but don’t forget Yobs!
July 16, 2007 at 10:51 amwait a sec…you’re not American, Svetlana? I must submit my resignation now.
July 17, 2007 at 9:36 am
did you see the commenter who requested a citypaper story on BYT? to use another acronym, WTF. you can hate preppy douchebags and their websites or you can hate hipster douchebags and their websites, but there is no way on god’s green earth that BYT would be the same breeding ground for racism, sexism, homophobia, classism or discussions about what fucking kind of car to buy as LNS is.
by the way, “k” was me. heh. i had fun. til i got dizzy, too. this whole thing is so out of control. i have access to the LNS forums (no, i haven’t been sucking republican cock (just say no to sex with pro-lifers!); i just know someone who managed to get an account) and the amount of rage directed at valdez is horrifying. they posted her phone number and are threatening a lawsuit. i hope the lawsuit threads are strictly tongue-in-cheek - it’s really, really hard to tell on LNS - because if not, that’s the saddest shit i’ve ever heard. bunch of fucking babies. “that ugly whore LIBELED us! waah, waah!” can it, patrick bateman.
July 13, 2007 at 4:28 pm