A History of D.C. Sex Scandals

May 5, 2008 by Libby  Send to a Friend

The DC MADAM IS DEAD! LONG LIVE THE DC MADAM!

As I am professionally trained as a pop cultural historian I am going to use my degree in American Studies to provide you with a robust history of Washington DC sex scandals. We’re going to go beyond Monica Lewinsky, Chandra Levy, Spitzer at the Mayflower, and Jessica Cutler (now linked to Spitzer’s madam!) and onto some sex scandals that, while maybe lesser known, are just as, if not more, salacious.

Rep. Wilbur Mills (D-Ar) ‘74: stopped for speeding by Park Police. When the cops approached, stripper Fanne Foxe, aka the “Argentine Firecracker”, fled the car and jumped into the Tidal Basin and consequently into our hearts forever!

Walter Jenkins (LBJ Presidential Aide) ‘64: caught having anonymous gay sex at the Capital YMCA (the best gym in the world and choice of Chris Burns, Fever, Jason DeRosa, and myself! Hmmmm….Join now!)

Rep. Barney Frank (D-MA) ‘89: his poor judge of character was made embarrassingly public when it was discovered that his male prostitute roommate had been using Frank’s apartment for his escort business.

Dick Morris (Clinton political consultant) ‘96: One week Time magazine devotes a cover to the political genius of Morris; the next week every major newspaper devotes space above-the-fold to his relationship with a toe-sucking hooker, forcing him to leave the Clinton campaign.

Rep. Joe Scarborough (R-FL) ‘01 : yeah that asshole. At about the same time as the Chandra Levy case, 28 year-old staffer Lori Klausutis was found dead in Scarborough’s office. Rumors of their affair forced Scarborough to resign. The coroner attributed the cause of death to a previously undiagnosed heart condition that caused Klausutis to collapse and hit her head. FYI: Klausutis had recently ran a 6k marathon. FYI: that same coroner had a history of falsifying autopsies.

House Page Scandal ‘83

Rep. Dan Crane (R-IL) and Rep. Gerry Studds (D-MA): went down hard for engaging in sexual relationships with 17-year-old congressional pages. Crane had sex four or five times at his apartment with a female page and Studds invited a male page to his Georgetown apartment and later on a two week trip to Portugal.

House Page Scandal ‘06

Rep. Mark Foley (R-FL): We all know about it, but the IMs Foley sent to pages are so fucking hilarious it’s worth revisiting:

• Maf54 (7:46:33 PM): did any girl give you a haand job this weekend?
• Maf54 (7:48:00 PM): did you spank it this weekend yourself?
• Maf54 (7:53:54 PM): do you really do it face down? Kneeling? On your back?
• Maf54 (7:54:31 PM): where do you unload it?
• Maf54 (7:57:45 PM): where do you throw the towel?

(Foley, are you serious?! Like this kid isn’t saving your hot chats?!)

And now…. the holy grail of sex scandals. With everything from Satanism to child sex slavery .

The Franklin Coverup Scandal 1989

The Washington Times connected key officials of the Ronald Reagan and George H. W. Bush administrations to an elaborate Washington, D.C male prostitution ring, and reported that two of these prostitutes even entered the White House on four separate occasions for late night tours. The allegations included “abduction and use of minors for sexual perversion.” Uh oh!!!!!

Nebraska State Senator Ernie Chambers blew the whistle on the prostitution ring when he had heard credible reports of boys and girls, in foster care, had been flown across the country to provide sexual favors for the illuminati.

At the center of the scandal was Craig J. Spence, a Washington, D.C.-based Republican lobbyist, and Lawrence King, who was eventually convicted of embezzling thirty-eight million dollars as manager of the Franklin Community Federal Credit Union in Nebraska. Right after Chambers blew the lid on the whole operation Craig Spence was found dead in his Ritz Carlton hotel room. 

The Discovery Channel was slated to run a documentary, titled Conspiracy of Silence, nation-wide on May 3, 1994 (14 years to-the-date before our RELAUNCH PARTY) . While the documentary appeared in TV Guide and in newspaper listings, it was never broadcast.

A separate civil case against Lawrence King gave us some more juicy details about the child-sex-ring: kidnapping, mind control, satanic ritual abuse, and sexual abuse!!!!!! OMFG.

This brings us back to suspicious deaths, prostitution, and conspiracy….

Deborah Jeane Palfrey was recently convicted on federal charges stemming from operating a prostitution service in the Washington, D.C. area with a number of high-profile clients. Thursday she was found dead in a storage shed on her mother’s Florida property of an apparent suicide.

Among Palfrey’s clients were former U.S. Agency for International Development chief Randall Tobias and Sen. David Vitter (R-LA). Who else could be on that list?!?!

Do you buy it? It’s way more fun not to!

Here are the goods about the DC Madam death that lay the ground work for an awesome scandal:

• One of the unnamed johns is allegedly the head of a conservative think tank! (Did the Neocons do it?)
• Palfrey claimed that she had 10,000 to 15,000 phone numbers of clients, most still unreleased! (Did your Neocon boss do it?)
• She openly advertised and recruited using THE CITY PAPER! (Did you do it?)

The possibilities are endless! It’s like a game of sexy clue!

Luckily Larry Flynt is on the case! He was was the first to link Sen. David Vitter to the DC Madam and he’s not stopping he has an entire staff of lawyers and investigators deicated to tracking leads on the sexual misadventures of Congress. And with Palfrey gone, I’m sure he is shifting his efforts to the sex power vaccum left in her absence.

The D.C. Madam is dead! Long live the D.C. Madam!

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