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Bentzen Ball Profile: Bryson Turner

Bentzen Ball Profile: Bryson Turner

October 7, 2009 by Cale

The Bentzen Ball is coming up, our first full on comedy festival. To get you better acquainted with the 5 million comedians involved, we had them fill out this very official questionnaire. All the other info you ever wanted on the Bentzen Ball is located on it’s very own special URL: http://www.bentzenball.com/

Name: Bryson Turner

DJ Name: DJ Rumpleclops (because I spin gold and have one eye)

Hometown: Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

Occupation you’ll fall back on if this comedy thing doesn’t work out:

DJ Rumpleclops

Best joke you’ve ever told:

I’ve been saving it for the Bentzen Ball.

Fellow Bentzen Ball comedian/comedienne you have a (no longer) secret crush on:

Reggie Watts, Chris Fairbanks, Hampton Yount, Martha Kelly

Favorite monument:

MLK Jr.’s

Worst name you were ever called as a child:

TBD

What are you doing right now? (be specific)

Skipping work to fill out this survey.  And wasting away in Austin, Texas.

If you had to have sex with an animal, what would you choose?

A Poodle??  That’s fucking GAY.

What are your pre-show rituals/superstitions?

I always get nervous and hope the show isn’t going to happen.  I hope for the fire alarm, like my sets are a pop-quiz that I didn’t study for.  That and I always want to take a nap right before I go up.  It’s weird.

Do you believe in God?

I believe in him the same way my parents believe in me – I think he has a lot of potential, but I’m not going to have faith in him until he gives me a reason to.  I want to be able to tell my friends about him, but right now, I’m kind of embarrassed to bring him up.

If you could eliminate one race from the Earth which would you choose?

Native Americans.  …check.

And finally, what did Tig bribe you with to get you to agree to come?

She promised a five-minute interview with Patton Oswalt before his show.  Is that still on, Tig?  Let me know.

————-

Funniest Person in Austin

Performance Schedule: HR 57-Comedy Room, Thursday 10:00pm, HR 57-Jazz Room, Friday 7pm, HR 57- Comedy Room, Saturday 10pm. Buy Tickets Here!

Bryson Turner’s profile continues to rise up the ranks of the best young comics in the country. His uniquely self-aware look at the struggles of being a “part-time adult” – his description of life in your 20’s – makes his voice and perspective a valuable one in the world of stand-up, and helped him win the prestigious Funniest Person in Austin contest earlier this year. The future is unknown for all comics and all people, but whatever Bryson ends up doing in comedy and in life, he will do so passionately.

Justin Cousson Says:

Bryson Turner left DC when the scene needed him the most. He’s a sneak, a traitor, and a Convent Garden nun.

That being said, he’s wildly funny and people definitely need to swing by HR-57 any night of the fest to see him.

October 7, 2009 at 1:06 pm