Brightest Young Things

By Brandon Wetherbee

Brandon Wetherbee hosts the talk show/podcast You, Me, Them, Everybody the first two Friday’s of the month at the Wonderland Ballroom and in Brooklyn and Chicago once a month. Listen to it online at youmethemeverybody.com. He’ll be at the Wonderland Ballroom on July 8 with guests Keli Anaya from Brightest Young Things, stand up comedian Tyler Richardson, a special set from The Dustys.

I used to be in bands. One of the worst aspects of playing music in front of people is hauling gear around. When I began hosting this talk show, I was happy to no longer have to cart around amplifiers and guitars to put on a show. I did not factor in all of the audio equipment I have to cart around to put on a show.

I have destroyed the wheels on many a suitcase. The walk from my apartment to the Looking Glass is about two miles each way. The walk to the train to get to the bus to go to New York to the train to walk to Pete’s Candy Store is about three miles. The walk to the train to the airport to Chicago to the train to the Hungry Brain is about four miles. In other words, I’ve been tugging around a fifty pound suitcase filled with recording equipment at least once a week for months. Am I complaining? Absolutely not. The walk or ride to each venue helps me run through the show in my head before stepping foot in the venue. Just like a band or a comic, the room you’re in plays a large factor in the outcome of the show. No two rooms are exactly alike and it’s imperative that you’re conscience of your surroundings. Here’s a brief overview of each venue, with tips for future talk show hosts.

Washington D.C.

• Wonderland Ballroom

Since the show is upstairs and no one goes upstairs unless there’s a show, you’re at an advantage. Most, if not everyone in the room, is there for the show. The lighting is dim, which is good for the crowd and bad for the stage. This show has the earliest start time, 8pm, and it really shouldn’t be any later. The D.C. crowds are nice. Really. This city doesn’t get enough credit for their audiences. They actually give new things a chance. Since most of them have no desire to do anything like this, they’re really attentive for the beginning and middle of the show. By the musical performance, they’re really tipsy and remember that they have no desire to do anything like this and are in very loud conversations about work only they can find interesting. Once again, I’m not complaining, I just tend to hear a lot of banter about politics from people that like to complain about politics.

TIP: Start on time before the kind people turn into regular people.

• Looking Glass Lounge

With no dedicated stage, some shows at the Looking Glass felt like we were ambushing the audience. Some felt like we were in a theater that happened to have a bar. No matter what, the setting, interesting lighting and decoration, decent sound and excellent staff made the show fun. Sometimes the recording quality wasn’t up to snuff because of one table that was there for not the show decided to sit five feet from me even through the back patio and basement were open. Once again, I’m not complaining, I just tend to hear a lot of banter about the good old college days from guys that like to reference not funny sitcoms.

TIP: Just because you can hear people tell each other “Family Guy” anecdotes, don’t mention you can hear people tell each other “Family Guy” anecdotes.

Chicago

• Hungry Brain

The hometown venue is also one of the hardest places to get a good recording. This has nothing to do with the equipment or acoustics of the bar and everything to do with comfort. I am extremely at ease on this stage. So much so that each show at the Hungry Brain seems to run at least 30 minutes and upwards of 90 minutes longer than any other show. Monologues I wrote as 4 minute rants turn into 12 minute musings. Interviews run 25 minutes and get cut down to 15 for the podcast. Conversations with my co-host Esmeralda Leon go so long the guest may not come on stage until 40 minutes into the show. Are these bad things? Not for the crowd at the bar. They’re awful for mixing down the show.

TIP: Just because you like it, don’t assume anyone else does.

• Whistler

It’s hard to demand attention when people are drinking $10+ cocktails, didn’t pay a cover and are sitting in a beautiful, dark room with minimal stage lighting. Though it’s not an easy room to perform in, it’s a great training ground. It’s the closest thing you can have to playing an away game. If you’re able to silence the crowd for a few minutes and maintain composure, there’s a feeling of satisfaction. The staff is made up of encouraging gentlemen that would all make excellent Little League coaches and whenever that’s the case, it’s hard not to love the venue.

TIP: Don’t get louder because the people not there for the show are talking. Stay the course and do your best not to scream.

Brooklyn

• Pete’s Candy Store

It took trips to 20 Brooklyn and Manhattan venues before I found Pete’s. The back room, the show room, is like a train car from an era when it was encouraged to be tipsy while traveling. The stage is about 8 feet wide and 4 feet deep, tiny enough that you can’t fuck around with visual jokes, which is great since I record an audio podcast. The downside is that the show is at midnight in Williamsburg, not the easiest time and place to demand attention. There’s a reason bands like playing small towns because nothing is usually there so when anything happens, they’re greeted with open arms. This is not the case at Pete’s.

TIP: If the audience is tuned out, it might not be your fault. If your guest is having fun, the listener at home will enjoy the show.

Thanks for reading and have a wonderful night.

*I tend to take photos of the guests on my phone during the show. The ones above are some of those.

Previously in behind the desk:

• 5/11: Behind the Desk #46: Radio Friendly Unit Shifter
• 5/4: Behind the Desk #45: Last Show, Re-introduction
• 4/27: Behind The Desk 44: As A Guest
• 4/20: Behind the Desk #43: Sharon Needles for President
• 4/13: Behind the Desk #10- ”Soon I'll Be In The Air!”
• 4/6: Behind The Desk 42: Bros Being Bros
• 3/30: Behind The Desk 41: Why This Is A Game Show
• 3/26: Behind The Desk 40: Before This is A Game Show
• 3/16: Behind The Desk 39: Everything is Terrible!
• 3/9: Behind The Desk 38: Poke The Bear